Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Randomize
