You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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