Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
