it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize
