my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Randomize
