Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
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