Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Randomize
