I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
