Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
Randomize