so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
