Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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