is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
handjob tips. give me some.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Randomize
