So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Randomize