Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
Randomize
