my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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