So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Randomize
