i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
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