Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
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