He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Randomize