I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Randomize
