Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
