I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Randomize
