She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
