Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Randomize
