After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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