you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
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