question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
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