White coat. Heels.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Randomize
