Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
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