Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize
