my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
