And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
