Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
