I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
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