Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
