scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
