Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Randomize
