I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
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