He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize
