whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
