you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
