my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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