no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
