Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
