i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
