is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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