so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
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