i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
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