if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
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