The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Randomize
